3 weeks, 2 days! That’s 21 days! 21 days until I leave for Phnom Penh, Cambodia and get to see my lovely friend, Heather (who’s been over there since August 2011), my other Christian brothers and sisters whom I have yet to meet, and others who I might be able to welcome to God’s family while I’m over there! 🙂 I’m STOKED! Me being stoked……THIS IS A GOD THING! I don’t know what happened (um…correction, yes I do), but I am excited to go! I want to go! I’m not scared! I just want to go! God is providing a way, Jesus is changing my Heart, and the Holy Spirit in me is saying go!
2 weeks ago, I did not want to go. 2 weeks ago I was scared, and I had doubts every time I thought of Cambodia. 2 weeks ago, I texted my friend (who is also going) telling her I didn’t want to go (both of us knowing that I would still go and that we had plane tickets and the whole shabang planned out). So, what’s the difference between this week and the last…hm…few months? Sometimes, when we give our testimonies, it seems like “this crappy thing happened, it was too much. I couldn’t handle it. Then I got better!!!! Praise God!”. For those of you in the low – I don’t have to tell you – it’s not like that. It takes time. It takes DAYS and MONTHS and YEARS of prayer. It takes time to heal. It’s not typically a split-of-the-moment event…so what happened? What changed?
1 week ago, I was at IHOPE hashing things out with God. I was seeking Him out, asking what the heck He was doing – praying that He would change my heart and give me His. I saw one week ago, but really, it hasn’t just been one week of prayer…..it’s been months. The idea of Cambodia came up a while back around December/January time frame. And, to be honest – it hasn’t been happy and hunkydorey, before or after that time. It’s been a huge rollercoaster, and though I feel like I’m on a higher point right now, who knows. I mean, really the only thing I can be certain of is life’s uncertainties. But, in the high and in the low, God is God and God is good. So, in the high, I’m banking on what God specifically told me from Isaiah 61 and Psalm 91. And in the low, I’m banking on what God has repeatedly told me from Isaiah 61 and Psalm 91. See, the funny thing is Truth is Truth despite my momentary feeling about Truth. So, yesterday, today, and tomorrow God is the same. And yesterday, today, and tomorrow God is good. All the time, God’s Truth stands true. And, that’s why it’s huge that my belief and my trust is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow despite situations changing yesterday, today, and tomorrow. So, up, or down, or upside down, it’s 3…2…1… 3 Persons. 2 (too) much. 1 Spirit. And this Spirit? It’s the SAME Spirit that both Jesus AND my Heavenly Father have! The Spirit within them is strong enough to overcome the fill-in-the-blank that is the 2 (too) much-ness of life.
2 (Too) much for me to handle
1 Spirit who can handle it for me
3 weeks…2 days…1 stoked Spirit…